Sensational Sixty

Join me on a journey of reinvention.

Archive for the category “Women’s Health”

Weight

It’s official.  I got on the scales the other day and I’m now heavier than I’ve ever been in my life.  How did this happen?  Rather, since I know HOW it happened, why did I LET it happen?

Photos-Model-Twiggy

image from: http://www.fabsugar.com/Photos-Model-Twiggy-3089058

As a child, my grandfather nicknamed me Twiggy.  Remember her from the 60s?  While I certainly wasn’t a super model, I did resemble her is body composition and probably, looking back, metabolism, two words that never entered my mind when I was 18!

In my twenties and thirties, I ate and drank what I wanted, whenever I wanted, occasionally gaining weight, but when my pants got too tight, I just gave up some of the more decadent things and the weight dropped right off. Easy, peasy, no problems.

I noticed around the age of 40, however, that weight didn’t just drop off anymore.  And there is where the weight struggle started, and has remained, for me.  At first, I didn’t know HOW to diet.  Had never had to, so what was the big deal?  Thus began the experimentation stage that I’ve been in ever since.

We are constantly barraged with the information that carrying too much weight is not healthy.   You can’t look in a magazine or watch TV without seeing ad after ad for weight loss products.  As you age, extra weight causes so many physical problems they are too numerous to list here.  For myself, my knees hurt, my back hurts, my stamina sucks and don’t even mention how hard it is to find any clothes that make me look good.  My cholesterol is high (but not too high, thankfully) and I’m blessed with normal blood pressure.  I realize my symptoms are far less than many people around me and around the country.

Nevertheless, the extra weight I carry has started to prevent me from doing some things that I enjoy.  I can’t explore a museum for as long as I’d like  or enjoy a walk on a beautiful day.  DIYing takes more days that it used to, because I can only do so much in a day.  And if I ignore my body and push on through, I definitely pay for it the next day and sometimes the days after that.  I want to be able to feel SEXY again.

As much as I have dragged my feet for the last twenty years, I’ve finally accepted the idea that I MUST lose weight.  Not so much for the way I look (although that is a big factor!), but for my health and for my desire to live the best way I can in this “third act” of my life.  And so, the process and, initially, the research begins.

Do any of you recognize yourself?

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Anger Management

I was wrong.  I thought I could improve my marriage by myself.  I can’t. While I can make my marriage a lot happier for my husband, I can’t make him want to fulfill my needs for our marriage.  In doing further research, and I should have known from other things that are going on in my life, he has no motivation to make any changes.  Things are working for him.  He gets great sex, great meals, a clean house and I get …. what?   The luxury of not working at my age?  What else?  What about feeling taken care of?  What about feeling cared for?  I was quite put out and didn’t hesitate to let him know about it.

These were the thoughts and feelings that were running through my head as I opened up my email the other day.  Since I subscribe to several blogs, I was not surprised to get this post from Always Well Within.  What did surprise me was the topic.  Anger Management.  Catch Anger Before it Catches You from Tiny Buddha was the perfect thing for me to read at the perfect time.

anger

Too often, when we get angry, we think that the solution is to vent that anger.  After all, haven’t we heard for years about the negative health effects of keeping things bottled up inside?  Unfortunately, most of us vent to the object of our anger – in this case, the husband.  Knowing the differences between men and women now, I know this doesn’t do any good and is even contrary to the result you want to get.  But, without taking a moment to consider the results of that venting, that is what I do – vent, and usually in a big way.

Tiny Buddha cautions us to consider the effect venting your anger has on our health and happiness.   Instead of automatically blowing up, if we will take just a moment to tune into ourselves, we can turn that anger around and learn the benefits of love, patience and tolerance.  Before I explode the next time, there are seven steps I am going to try to process through:  take responsibility, breath, apologize (if you couldn’t get to these steps in time!), transform the negative energy, resolve, forgive myself and move on.

Long story short, my husband and I had an honest conversation and I’m back on the track of making our marriage a better place to live.  I learned that, even though I can’t see it, there are changes taking place inside him that, hopefully, will manifest as action in time.  So the next time I lose my temper or get frustrated, I’m going to try to take myself out of the picture for just a moment and implement Tiny Buddha’s suggestions.

What about you?  Are you able to process your anger in a way that is healthy?  I encourage you to click on the link above and read more about this way of approaching anger.

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